Friday Shoegasm: The hunt for the perfect black boots

Say it with me, shoe whores: I have plenty of boots. I have plenty of boots. I have plenty of boots.

Oh, goodness, I want these boots.

I've been on the hunt for the perfect black high boots since the mid-80s. I had them. I had several pairs of them. And they were glorious -- buttery leather, not too squeezy on the calf, the perfect shape for pairing with pencil skirts and not too dressy for jeans. Of course, I wore those boots into the ground, literally took inches off the heel I wore them with such conviction. I haven't been able to replace them.

I was close. Last winter, I scored some suede-ish over the knee numbers with a ridiculously high heel and platform that was just this side of mid-70s North Avenue/Clybourn hooker. I felt so damn smart for snagging those black boots for $35 and they felt like everything I'd dreamed. Until I put them on a few weeks ago for the first time this winter, turned to face the mirror and felt a heel snap completely off.  It was like a moment out of "Moonlighting" except I wasn't chasing a bad guy not-so covertly with Bruce Willis across the roof of a skyscraper.

Repairing those "perfect" boots will cost more than I paid for them, so...you know, I'll just keep them in memorium under my bed with my prom heels for the next decade or two.

Back to the search for the perfect black boots:

* 4-5" heels, preferably chunky wood heels or wedges because people at first-grade pick-up can only take so much Harper Valley PTA.

* A shaft that will fit without requiring calf-Spanx, not that I have ginormous lower legs but that makers-of-boots seem to base their mold measurements on Heidi Klum or the average calf size of fourth-grade girls.

* Leather, suede, something not-fake so I can think "suck it, PETA" with every step I take.

* Same aforementioned pencil skirt/jeans styling.

* Less than a thousand dollars. OK, $400. Can I get $350? Who's in for $109? I'm a bargain shoppper, friends. No need to cover that up. I want designer boots for a garage sale price. I'm not kidding.

* Pretty.

Obviously this is a tall boot order (also a tall-boot order). After combing Zappos, iDeeli, RueLaLa, Gilt, Piperlime and many other searches and sites, I've found very few I really want. Or that my budget will allow.

And then today, I saw these. Lovely, lovely these. And I can't stop thinking about them. How they'd look with the sweater dresses I adore or the skinny cords I want to wear every single day all winter long. How they'd dress up the sexless, sleeping-bag down coat I will be in until July.

They are made by Frye -- I love Frye boots. My motorcycle boots are by Frye and look and feel amazing, even a few winters later.OH! And the name -- Harmony Tall Harness. Rrrrrr! So determined!

They are waxed suede, no kind-of-soft stuff that will fall off in chunks once they are exposed to a couple of grains of de-icing salt. And the buckles...I just love those little details on my feet.

Perfect, right? Nope. These babies are $388. As much as I love myself, there is just no way I can invest that much in one of nine pairs of boots in my possession.

I guess that means I'll carry on. Hobbling on that one broken heel.

 

Do you have a perfect pair of shoes that has eluded you?

 

 

 

Keep hunting here:

• Dear internets: I am so sorry about my shoes
• Jesus wanted me to have these boots
• Real boys wear heels

Comments

[Cailey]

"Leather, suede, something not-fake so I can think "suck it, PETA" with every step I take." -- My inner vegan (well, I guess I'm outwardly vegan too, but whatever) is crying tears of sadness. Those boots are cute though.

[Kristen]

I know -- I've fallen in love with many a Frye boot. I purchased one pair (brown Harness motorcycle) when Heels.com was having a sale and I had an extra $50 to spend there or something. I love them so much, but, yeah. The price.