I am blogger, hear me whore

While I'm working out all this hoodoo-guru-y whatnot in my head about what to write here and how often and why in the world my whole body is seeping this nostalgic, sentimental molasses, why don't I just direct you to the stuff I am actually churning out elsewhere. Rest assured, friends, that when I am not blah-blah-blahing about my boy or ridiculously expensive heels or how a woodchip tragically got stuck in my sandals at the park (see how I tied those first two topics together there just when you thought I was out of writerly practice?), I am composing artful and important posts on boobs, periods and Jessica Simpson (yes, AGAIN).

Here's the skinny on what I talk about when I get to sit at the cool kids' table. OK, most of the time it is more like speaking at a youth group convention or possibly the oddly enthusiastic singalongs with groups from different sleep-away camps, none of whom belt out exactly the same words to the same songs and end up sort of humming along awkwardly. That should convince you to join the conversation, right?

On with it, already! The posts I'm pimping are about:

• What the crazy ways you sleep could say about your personality (why no, I did not get a degree in anything related to science, which will be apparent as soon as you read this first paragraph).

• Craplastic toys in nasty fast food that certain elected Californian officials say is spurring on childhood obesity (and I clearly, mean-mommily agree with).

• One more (fabulous, non-Cars video) reason to crush on Paulina Porizkova.

• Crappy coffee (ooohlala, elle est la punny bloggesse, mais non?)

• The laughable cause-related marketing campaign dreamed up by the fried chicken folks to get you to buy buckets of lard to end breast cancer (well, hello there, advertiser).

• And finally, in lieu of Jessica Simpson, how about some Gaga?

Comments

[Yum Yucky]

haha! I though you said, "COMPOSTING artful and important posts". Ummm, no, I read that wrong. SO! There's nothing wrong with a little posting pimping. Go on and pimp slap me with a post. I'll click on it.

[Cailey]

You wrote the sleep position article? What a badass!! I read that as I perused the FRONT PAGE of Yahoo! My friend read it too. I feel like I have just found out that someone I know is a huge celebrity. :) Anyway. It was awesome. YAY for internet fame.

[Jessica Ashley (Sassafrass)]

Thanks, Yum! I can always count on you, mama.

And, Cailey, you are a thousand kinds of awesome for my ego. MWAH!